


keep your feet on the ground (when your head's in the clouds)

by orphan_account



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Punk, Self Confidence Issues, Strangers to Lovers, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:40:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24831001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Dan thinks the stranger is a damn good kisser, and he’s so glad that he paid extra for lip stain.“Take a compliment.” The stranger smirks. “See you next week?”Dan nods slowly, and the stranger turns away, leaving him speechless.Dear Lord, what did Dan get himself into?or, Dan meets Phil at a party, except he doesn't really know that it's Phil.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 11
Kudos: 60
Collections: Phandom Reverse Bang 2020





	keep your feet on the ground (when your head's in the clouds)

**Author's Note:**

> hellooooo this is for the prb 2020, thank you to [cal](https://candanandphilnot.tumblr.com) for your amazing art, and thank you to tara for beta reading it i lub u both sweet home pennsylvania and texas
> 
> link to [art](https://candanandphilnot.tumblr.com/post/621489346507374592/keep-your-feet-on-the-ground-when-your-heads-in) | link to [post](https://irlsero.tumblr.com/post/621489213210296320/keep-your-feet-on-the-ground-when-your-heads-in)

Dan is applying his lipstick when his younger brother enters the room.

“What the hell do you want?” Dan asks, rolling his eyes.

“You look like a girl,” his brother answers, fake-gagging.

Dan ignores him and puts the lipstick back in his makeup drawer. He takes the eyeliner out and applies it as well. He smears it for ‘maximum punk effect.’ He doesn’t really know what to expect since it’s his first party. Dan was never invited to any of them when he was in high school, since he didn’t have many friends, but upon entering college he found people who seemingly matched his aesthetic and style.

Dan doesn’t know who’s hosting it; he found out about the party from his group of friends. He wonders if his group of friends are going to help him out or if they’re going to have fun without him. They’ve definitely done that before, and most of the time Dan wonders if they’re actually his friends or not. They were kind enough to invite him to the party, right? He sighs and shakes his head. At this rate, he’s going to be too anxious to go.

He knows he’s probably overdoing his appearance, since most people are going to be shit-faced anyway and won’t care about looks, but he should at least look decent.

The group piles into someone’s, Dan can’t remember whose, van. The ride doesn’t take that long, but Dan can already feel himself itching to go home. Maybe this isn’t such a good idea after all. He doesn’t want to seem like a wimp though; he’s a punk, for fuck’s sake. A lame one at that, but still a punk nonetheless.

Just like he predicted, the group ditches him the instant they get to the door. He gets handed a shot glass, and he downs it in an instant. Whoever handed him the shot hands him another one, and Dan gladly downs that one as well.

It doesn’t take long for him to realise that he’s out of place at this party. There’s no manual for parties like this, and Dan would really rather not drink until his liver explodes and die in the middle of the road.

It’s an exaggeration, but still.

Dan nearly retches. How does this place already smell like skunk when the party hasn’t been that long yet? He thinks it’s pathetic that he can’t handle the smell, but he desperately needs a breath of fresh air.

As he escapes the strong scent of marijuana and alcohol, he steps out to the balcony to see a tall man, taller than him, wearing a leather jacket. He turns around, and Dan takes in his appearance. Black and blue hair, snake bites, piercing blue eyes. If Dan wasn’t gay before, he definitely is now.

He takes the cigarette out of his mouth. “Can I help you?”

“Just needed a break, mate,” Dan answers.

The man laughs. “Me too. Would you like a smoke?”

Dan nods, and the stranger lights a cigarette up for him. He didn’t think about bringing cigarettes with him, so now he’s thankful that someone did - even if it wasn’t originally for him. Dan exhales and watches as the smoke blows out into the sky.

“What are you doing out here? The place smells like all sorts of shit anyway,” Dan asks, tilting his head to look up at the man in front of him. “I’m surprised you didn’t just smoke inside like everyone else.”

“I could ask you the same thing.” He pauses, exhaling another puff of smoke. “I just needed some alone time. Anthony’s parties can get a little too much sometimes. Cigarettes help with the anxiety.” 

“I get that,” Dan says. “It’s my first party, and this is making me realise I’m not actually into it at all. I remember being fifteen and wanting so badly just to fit in and attend these things.”

“That’s too bad,” the stranger says. “I was hoping to see you at future parties.”

“I’m sure we could get along outside of this party.” He pauses. “Or, I think so. I don’t even know your name anyway.”

“Maybe. But don’t you like being scandalous? For a punk, you should learn to live a little.” He stumps his cigarette on an ashtray before stumping Dan’s as well. “I’ll tell you my name some other time.”

Dan could feel the man’s hands over his cheeks, and he could feel himself turning red and getting warmer in contrast to the cool breeze outside. The man leans in to kiss him, and Dan lets himself kiss back.

He pulls away, flustered.

“Did you like it?” the stranger asks.

Dan nods slowly. “I did, yeah.”

“Does this mean you’ll go to next week’s party?” he asks, smirking.

Dan can’t find it within himself to say no to him, even though he doesn’t know the stranger’s name at all. “Yeah, sure. I’ll go.”

-

The week following that is uneventful. Dan wishes that time would just hurry up so that he can see that hot stranger from the party again. God, he’s so desperate to find out his name already. Actually, if he thinks about it hard enough, names don’t actually matter if it’s a one-night stand.

Is this a one-night stand? No. Dan shakes his head. If his ‘thing’ with the stranger was a one night stand, the stranger would’ve already taken him to his bed already.

He should get his mind out of the gutter. He’s supposed to be studying for fuck’s sake. Not that his studies were interesting to him anyway. Dan thinks he sounds like a whiny teenager all over again, but he doesn’t really have an option. Everyone is moving on with their lives, and Dan is going to be stuck if he doesn’t do  _ something _ .

Dan scoffs. “As if a queer punk like me would be able to succeed anyway.”

“Hm?” someone around the corner says.

Dan looks up, mortified. “Sorry, I was talking to myself.”

“Don’t be sorry! We all do it sometimes, yeah?” the guy says, smiling at him.

Dan takes a good look at his face. Attractive, that’s for sure. The guy has an eyebrow piercing and a red streak in his ash brown hair. Different from the stranger at the party, that’s for sure.

Why is he still thinking about the stranger from the party when there’s another hot guy in front of him?

“Hello?”

“Yeah, yeah, sorry,” Dan says. “The name’s Dan, by the way.”

The guy takes a seat in front of him, and Dan shuts the lid of his laptop. “Adam.”

“Adam… it’s a pretty name. Suits you,” Dan comments.

“Not as pretty as you.” Adam winks. Goddamn, he’s smooth. “What’s a pretty guy like you doing here in the library anyway?”

“Studying.”

Adam laughs. “Ah, undergrad.”

_ Oh, he’s older, huh? _

“Freshman year.” Dan laughs nervously. He contemplates slapping himself in the face, because he needs to get together or else Adam will realize that Dan is a mess.

“I made it to my junior year before dropping out last year,” Adam says. “Why pay for something you don’t wanna spend your money on, y’know?”

Dan thinks he gets it now. “Well, what do you do for a living?”

“I play in a band,” Adam answers. “It’s new and all, but I’m excited. I like playing music, especially the punk rock stuff. I’m glad that I can finally make that dream come true, especially now that I’m not in school anymore. I do a ton of side jobs to make money for it.”

“That sounds cool,” Dan says, but gets cut off by his alarm reminding him to go to class. “Crap, I have to go now. I have a lecture, unfortunately.”

“Oh,” Adam says, dejected.

Dan is feeling brave right now though. There’s no harm in asking Adam out. “But, if you want to give me your number, I’ll text you? Provided I survive Math 107.”

Adam laughs. “You know what? I like you. You’re funny. I’ll give you my number. Give me your notebook.”

Dan gives Adam one of his notebooks, and Adam takes a pen out of his jacket pocket to scribble it in.

“Good luck,” Adam says, “and don’t forget to text me.”

“I, um, thank you.” Dan blushes, and walks away.

He got Adam’s phone number, Jesus Christ. That’s probably the most gutsy thing he’s ever done in his life. Other than go to the party, of course. He still hasn’t gotten a tattoo yet, or piercings that weren’t his main lobes. But who cares about the party?

When he texts Adam later that night after class, Dan sends a simple ‘hello,’ and it launches into a two-hour conversation about the most random topics. Dan thinks it’s sweet.

However, that doesn’t stop him from going to the next party again on Friday. There was no reason for him to go, but his stupid friends wanted him to join them even though he was ignored last time. Dan, the world’s most famous people pleaser, says yes to his so-called friends.

And so there he is, in a crowded and weed-filled apartment with nothing to do. He’s almost a hundred percent sure that the stranger is there again, so he plans to avoid the balcony fully and just deal with the stupid smell.

Except that doesn’t happen, because someone bumps into him spilling their entire cup of beer down his shirt, and the stranger happens to see him.

“Hey, I have an extra shirt if you want,” the stranger says politely, smiling at him as if Dan wasn’t a cruel monster with plans to avoid him the entire night. “Wait for me on the balcony.”

Dan, reigning champion of being a pushover, doesn’t say no and waits for him there.

The stranger, as promised, returns with an extra shirt. Dan feels awkward, but accepts the shirt nonetheless.

“How the fuck do you have an extra shirt here?”

“I live here,” the stranger says nonchalantly. “Anthony’s one of my roommates.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Why don’t you just leave if you’re uncomfortable with the wild parties?” Dan blurts. He bites his tongue afterwards, cursing at himself for asking a question that was definitely not his business.

The man doesn’t take offense. “Sometimes I do. I don’t know. I’m a people watcher.”

Dan wrinkles his nose. “Gross.”

“Okay, not like that,” the stranger reassures. “I swear. It’s just fun being curious, I guess.”

“Alright, Mr. People Watcher, what else do you do other than go to shit parties every Friday and watch people?” Dan asks.

The man shrugs. “Lots of things. I work at a media company. How about you?”

“Undergrad.” 

He laughs. “Awful. I feel your pain.” He takes a pack of cigarettes out and holds one out to Dan. “Want one?”

Dan nods, and the stranger uses his lighter to light both of them. He exhales a puff before twirling it around his fingers. “Why are you being nice to me?”

“I’m nice to everyone,” the stranger says. “At least, that’s what I’m told.”

Dan laughs. “Yeah. I meant me specifically though.”

“Why not? You’re cute.”

Dan blushes. “Thanks, I guess.”

The stranger stumps his cigarette out and leans in closer to Dan, taking him by surprise and kissing him. Dan kisses back.

Dan thinks the stranger is a damn good kisser, and he’s so glad that he paid extra for lip stain.

“Take a compliment.” The stranger smirks. “See you next week?”

Dan nods slowly, and the stranger turns away, leaving him speechless.

Dear Lord, what did Dan get himself into?

-

On Monday, Dan sits in the public library in order to “study.” Not really. It’s more like he’s looking for an excuse to see Adam again, even though he already has his phone number and all.

Dan doesn’t know what he’s thinking.

_ “This is a stupid idea,”  _ he tells himself. All he’s doing is scribbling random song lyrics in his math notebook. None of it is legible, because his atrocious handwriting looks more like chicken scratch than anything else.

“Dan,” a voice calls.

Dan looks up from his notebook, and lo and behold - Adam.

Adam did say that he frequented the local library a lot since he likes to read gothic literature, but it still surprised Dan. 

“Hey,” Dan says casually. “You can sit if you want.”

Adam sits across from him. “How’ve you been? Y’know, other than from our  _ texts _ ?”

Dan feels queasy at the way Adam said ‘texts.’ They weren’t even that scandalous or flirty. Dan was just trying to get to know him more.

“I’m alright,” Dan says. “You?”

Adam launches into a long rant about his band or whatever the fuck. Dan tunes out halfway through. Is it rude of him to think that Adam’s personality is starting to irk him? That he’s annoyed with the way Adam is already acting as if they’ve known each other for years even though they met merely a week ago.

_ Hmph _ , Dan thinks. He should be grateful that someone is interested in him, so he lets Adam talk. He lets Adam talk right until his alarm for class goes off.

“Sorry,” he cuts him off. “Class again.”

“Oh?” Adam asks. “Well, you could either go to class, or you could stay here with me.” He leans across the table, way too close for comfort. “After all, there must be some reason you went here instead of your university library.” He smirks.

_ There is _ , Dan thinks. He hates seeing his classmates and other students he recognises at the uni library. Adam is looking at him, waiting for an answer. “I suppose I could stay longer.”

“Great! Hey, what do you say about going on a date this Saturday, hm?”

Dan says yes, because of his stupid inability to say no to people, and ends up staying until his lecture is over. He isn’t surprised when later that night there’s a zero in the gradebook for the quiz that he completely forgot was going to happen that day.

-

He doesn’t go to the library for the rest of the week. He does, however, go to the stupid party at Anthony’s house, whoever the fuck Anthony is. It’s concerning that he doesn’t know peoples’ names. Dan doesn’t pile into the group van like last time though. Instead he ends up taking the stupid bus, which is a twenty-minute walk from his house and a thirty-minute bus ride. He hates exercise, so why did he do this to himself today?

Oh well. Nothing he can do now.

He shows up to the party short of breath, ready to collapse on the floor, until he sees the hot stranger on the balcony.

Dan walks out to meet him.

“Hi!” The stranger beams. “I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”

“You did say ‘see you next week,’” Dan points out.

“Oh! Huh, I guess I did. Either way, I’m glad you’re here,” the stranger says. The way that he’s so  _ happy  _ compared to his appearance is weird but fascinating. Dan thinks it suits him.

“Are you excited for the weekend?” he asks.

Dan shrugs. “I mean, I have a date tomorrow, but other than that, not really.”

He looks crestfallen. “A date?”

“Why?” Dan asks.

“I mean, I dunno. I thought we had something.”

“How could we have something if you won’t even tell me your name,” Dan spat.

The stranger frowns. “I… yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry.” There’s an awkward pause between them until he speaks again. “I think I’m gonna go now.”

_ Well, that was anticlimactic.  _

Dan lets him leave the balcony, and once he’s sure that the stranger won’t see him leave the party, he goes home on the cold and shitty bus.

-

He wakes up the next morning dreading his date with Adam, but begrudgingly gets ready for it anyway. His brother makes fun of him for his punk attire once again, and Dan wants to dig his head into the ground.

Dan ends up scrolling through his computer until it’s time for him to take the bus to the coffee shop where Adam said he would meet him at.

Upon arrival, Adam doesn’t look too pleased to see him.

“Where the hell have you been?” Adam asks, angrily. “You were supposed to be here ten minutes ago.”

“I had to take the bus,” Dan says. “It’s not my fault that the bus was late.”

“Maybe next time you shouldn’t take the bus.”

Dan holds himself back from yelling at Adam and telling him that he doesn’t really have another choice.

“Would you like something to drink?” Adam asks him.

Dan shakes his head. He’s not in the mood for it anymore.

“Suit yourself,” Adam says. “One caramel coffee.” He hands his cash over to the cashier.

Dan wrinkles his nose. What kind of person doesn’t say ‘please’ or ‘thank you’ when ordering? He used to work as a grocer over the summer, he knows how awful dealing with customer service is.

“Thank you,” he says to the barista, since Adam hadn’t.

They wait for his drink, and once Adam gets it, he grimaces.

“Why is there whipped cream on it?!” Adam barks. “Get me a new one.”

Dan flushes, mortified. Everyone is staring at them now. “Adam, calm down. You’re causing a scene.”

“No, you calm down! I don’t want any whipped cream on my coffee!”

“Sir, you didn’t say you didn’t want whipped cream on it,” the barista says, shaking.

Adam growls. “I don’t care! I’m a regular here, you should know not to put whipped fucking cream on my coffee!”

“Jesus fucking Christ, would you quit acting like an entitled brat?!” Dan snaps, tired of hearing Adam abuse this poor barista. “She’s not your maid, and she doesn’t have time to remember everyone’s orders. I’m leaving.”

Dan slaps a few dollar bills on the counter. “You deserve it,” he tells the barista, and she nods, pocketing the money. Adam doesn’t bother following him, and when he sits down on the bus he deletes Adam’s number and text thread.

-

For the most part, Dan feels better about himself. He pulls his math grade back up to a B- and takes advantage of the retake opportunity his professor gave him. He still thinks that school is pointless, but it feels good realising that he’s smart and capable all by himself.

And yet, he still can’t stop thinking about the hot stranger, and how he regrets what he said that night. There are a plethora of reasons why the stranger wasn’t comfortable telling him his name yet, and it isn’t Dan’s place to judge him for it.

So he rides the stupid bus once again to the yet another weekly party, and isn’t surprised in the slightest when he sees the stranger standing on the balcony smoking another cigarette.

“Hey,” Dan says, and the stranger turns around, taking the cigarette out.

“Hey. Listen, I’m - ”

Dan cuts him off. “It’s okay, I mean, you don’t have to explain it to me. I was being a prick. I’m sorry.”

“No, no.” He shakes his head. “The only reason why I hadn’t told you my name before is because I haven’t really chosen one completely yet? I’m trans.”

“Ah,” Dan says. “It’s cool, I don’t mind.”

“Yeah,” the stranger says sheepishly. “I just didn’t want you to keep calling me by my birth name or whatever. I think I do have a name I wanna try out though.”

“What is it?” Dan asks, curious.

He laughs nervously. “This is going to make me sound like I’m old, but Phil. Short for Philip. It’s after my uncle, I look up to him a lot.”

“I think it suits you,” Dan says. “It doesn’t make you sound old at all. It’s honorable that you’re choosing a name after your uncle.”

Phil blushes. “Thank you.” It’s quiet between them, save for the breeze of the wind. “Can I hold your hand?”

“Go for it.”

“How was your date by the way?” Phil asks him.

Dan makes a disgusted face. “Awful. Dude was a fucking prick to the servers, mate.”

Phil laughs. “Ew. People like him shouldn’t be allowed to exist.”

“You’re right.”

“So now that we’ve cleared this whole misunderstanding up and you’re not going on another date with that asshole,” Phil says a few moments later, and Dan looks up at him. “Would you like to go on a date with me?”

Dan giggles. “Yeah, why not?”

Phil beams. “Can I kiss you?”

“Like you haven’t already.” Dan snorts. They kiss each other anyway.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you!


End file.
